Sleep Training

We are in the midst of sleep training Sam. With me being back to work full time, waking up once or twice a night is wearing me down and probably part of the reason I can't seem to shake this cold. With Michael working from home and watching Sam, having a predictable and scheduled nap pattern will greatly help his productivity and expectations for his work day. It's much later than we started with Adam, but better late than never.

It's work, but it's structure, and I like structure. Adam was successfully sleeping through the night by now because we started earlier, and I loved that I could lay him down for naps and bed without the crying and fighting. His body knew the routine. I'm anxious for Sam to learn it, too.

With Adam, people would tell us how "lucky" we are to have a good sleeper. Luck? Heck, no! It was work! Please do not discount all the effort we put in to making sure our child learns how to be a good sleeper. It is ironic to think that something so natural has to be taught how to be most effective. I believe it's one of the best things you can teach your child.

So what is sleep training? Sleep training means consciously being attuned to his needs and responding to his cues before it's too late. It means always being mindful of the feed-wake-sleep routine. It means planning errands and outings around his naps. It means putting his sleep needs first. It means consistency and schedule.

When you hit the timing right, it is so easy! But if you miss the window, you have a tired, crying baby that has difficulty falling asleep and difficulty staying asleep for a complete nap. Sleep begets sleep.

We are following the Babywise series, modifying the recommendations to fit our household and what we're comfortable with. We are not comfortable with Crying It Out. There's a difference between fussing and crying, and while I will let him fuss for 10 minutes or so, I will not ignore him when he escalates to a distressed cry. We are not comfortable withholding a feeding just because the clock tells us it's not feeding time yet. We'll feed him and adjust our schedule from there.

Here's the schedule that is working for us (3 months old). Times vary but are close to this:

7am - wake, nurse
8am - nap

10am - wake, eat
11am - nap

1pm - wake, eat
2pm - nap

4pm - wake, eat
5pm - short nap

7pm - nurse
8pm - bed

10pm - "dream feed" (Feed him without really waking him)

Initially we had some disruptions that affected Sam's schedule, including a bit of a cough/cold and ROLLING OVER!!! Yes, at 3-months he's already rolling over, mostly (and impressively) from back to belly. A couple of the nights I found him unhappily on his belly. And if he hasn't actually rolled over in his crib, he is likely scooted all the way to the end, possibly rotated 90-180 degrees, and has his head up against the side or corner. This kid already needs a bigger bed.

We've been on this routine for over a week now, and while he's only had 1 night that he's slept fully through the night (from 10pm til almost 6am), he's going down for naps much easier and wakes in the morning cooing in his crib. He's easier to put to bed at 8pm than our 3-year old!

Here's hoping the predictability will naturally lend itself to longer nights soon.